The loss of summer

The street was long and slender, houses neatly laid on both sides, I met her at the eastern corner of the street next to the beauty saloon. She was hiding behind the high wall, seeking some shade in the bright afternoon sun. The sun was strong, I saw the roofs of the houses shining, people walking by wearing shorts and using magazines as hand-fans. I stoped, lit my cigarette and took a moment of pause in my long walk.

“Can I bump one of those” she came out of the corner and took me by suprise. “Sure” I said, trying to handle my confusion, I offered her the pack of cigarettes and the match-box. She was wearing a skirt, a blue top and open sandals, sandals made of leather, not the beach going kinds. She wore glasses and had black and grey hair, she was ageing gracefully. I looked at her light the cigarette, hiding against the warm wind blowing across the road.

“You look like you could take some rest, want to come inside my humble adobe?” she said pointing towards the corner she was hiding.

“Yea, why not, I could kill some time with a fellow smoker”, I walked into the shaded corner, it was dirty- pee and spit marks on top of fading graffitis.

She looked at me with her sharp eyes and said- “What is troubling you? Are you alright?” I could sense the compassion in her voice, she was not making small talk, she sounded sincere.

“I just let the love of my life walk away from me. She came to visit me here, we had a beautiful weekend. We held hands and walked in the nearby forest in the warm, moist afternoon. We kissed. We shared a long warm kiss in the garden outside our Airbnb. We grilled meat and drank beers, made passionate love in the evenings. But now she is gone” I almost said everything in one breath. Maybe I wanted to say and she happened to be there.

“You know what, I loved someone I had to let go.” She paused, a dense cloud of smoke floated next to her face.

She continued “We went to a music festival together, far away in rural France, no one knew us there. We slept in a tent, swam naked in the sea and made love in the beach. It was such a perfect summer, but I had to let them go.They were not mine, maybe they were mine for that moment of my life, that swim in the sea, that dance in the festival, but they had to go away. Sometimes letting go is the only way to keep the love alive.”

Sadness overwhelmed me. I felt a deep pain in my heart. I had to let her go, I said to myself. I had to let her go.

* * *

The summer was ending, the roads were falling silent and people wore darker clothes. I still remember the warmth of her body pressing against mine. I had to let her go.